Ask White Star

~ Millie Chalk
The phrase; “nothing is sure in life but change”

has been said throughout the ages by many

people in just as many ways, but the point is;

change is the one thing you can be absolutely

sure of.  Often it’s considered to be either good or bad, but what I’ve discovered is that it cannot be judged such in the moment since we don’t know how it will unfold, when considering what’s to come.  What is important is what we think of the change and how we react to it.  Looking at what is perceived as a negative change from a positive viewpoint; (Yes, it takes a lot of effort at first, but it is possible) and recognizing that the change we face could easily turn out to be our “best case scenario”, can determine what’s to come.

Throughout our day we go through numerous little changes that we hardly recognize, if at all.  When it’s something bigger; (a marriage, divorce, a move, a death, or loss of any kind) we term it as a transition.  It’s these transitions that will often send our lives into another direction and can make us uncomfortable, because we don’t have a crystal ball handy, but I have a recipe to successfully face those changes. 

To glean the wisdom needed to yield the answer to the question of transitions, I once again look only as far as my horse experience. In horse training jargon, a transition is when you move from one gait to the next, be it walking to trot, trot to canter and back again.  In competitions the horse is judged by how smooth and effortless these transitions can be, with the least effort on behalf of the rider, creating a seamless image of a relaxed horse moving with a level top line, from his head all the way through his back and into his haunches. 

It takes weeks, months and even years of training at various skill levels to achieve the perfect balance between horse and rider.  Going through the process of transitioning itself, while implementing the essential components of relaxation, strength, connection and timing is enough to, (in time) build the necessary carriage to allow the flow of energy to all the components of the movement.

An absolute component of successful transitions is the support of energy.  One would expect by using proper aids, along with pressure from seat and legs, synchronized with perfect timing, would be a must for upward transitions, but experts will tell you that such support is even more important for a downward transition.

Just as in the horse world, our lives are earmarked by transitions.  And if executed well, with proper timing and flow, they can create greater stability for our lives through proper balance.  And like with horses, we must give as much energy to support our downward transitions as we do with our upward.  For example: Anytime we think we’ve failed at something what do we do?  We throw our hands up and feel defeated.  Our energy is blocked, it no longer flows, and we often drop not only what it is we’ve been attempting to do, but other things in our life as well. 

Each time we fail to support a downward transition in our lives, we lose our balance, as well as our self-esteem.  If we pile up enough unsupported failures, after awhile we become defeated, lose our confidence and develop resistance, the kind that becomes a vicious cycle leaving us unwilling to try something new or the least bit challenging.

So how do we support a downward transition?  The same as with horses; with energy.  A wise and well trained rider knows that the horse underneath them has all the natural components to accomplish what is asked, and that they only need offer guidance and the time and space for the horse to answer the request of its partner.
Also as with horses, we too have a guidance system.  It revolves around what we are feeling, first physically, but more credibly, emotionally.  Where do our thoughts fit in?  They are simply there to support what our emotions are telling us.  Of course our thoughts can easily block the guidance that our inner being is offering.  Why is this?  It’s because it’s always easier to practice what we know, even if it’s unwanted.  Many of us have been raised surrounded by negative family, work and community for so long that it is deeply embedded within our psyche.  I know from experience that negativity can take years to overcome, but I ‘m a testimony that positivity can rule our lives, if we only allow it.

When we support our downward transitions with as much positive energy as our upward transitions, it creates a balance and flow to our lives, directing our path to a place we’ve always desired, but were never aware.  Let your emotions guide you to find what feels good about every situation, and in doing so, find the promise of a happy and fulfilled life!