Contact us at: whispernthunder1@gmail.comFrom Nope to Acceptance
~ Orannhawk
As a child I frequently had nightmares about
nope ropes (aka snakes). I woke the house
many times screaming, sobbing and shaking
with intense fear. The dreaming and the
nightmares were present until I was in my
mid-twenties, with only an occasional
occurrence over the years. It’s interesting to
note that I have created several pieces of art
that featured a nope rope, once in college, and another a few years ago.
I grew up hunting and fishing, and seeing them in the wild was common and therefore, I have a heightened awareness of my surroundings, what to watch for, the odor of some, in particular rattlers, as well as the teachings passed on from my parents, grandparents, aunties and uncles, all who were seasoned outdoorsmen and women.
Years ago, I was living in a rental home in a neighboring city. The backyard was unfinished at time, dirt and small rock made up the deeply inclined space. It was fenced nicely, and all around the back were various sizes of cedar trees. The house was three years old at the time, with a fireplace, and all appliances. The rent was great, the carpet was new and a lovely golden beige, the same color of the scorpions that infested the house a few months into the lease. I used a broom to beat on the shower curtains to knock down any scorpions before I showered every day. Watching them creep across the ceiling at night, glowing in the moonlight from the windows, did not play well with my anxiety of creepy crawly things.
In the last days before moving to a different rental, I took my time to pack and carefully seal the boxes so there weren’t any guests joining in on the move. The hall closet was one of the last to clean and as I reached down to turn on the vacuum, I saw a shadowy form on the closet floor. It was a skin, the shed skin of a nope rope, a little over a foot long. I admit, I did feel the panic because it had been in my home. I never saw it, it didn’t appear at the next rental, nor was it hiding out in any of the boxes I packed and unpacked yet again.
A few days ago, my kin were at my farm property, in the beginning stages of clearing some of the mesquites, cutting a new ‘road’ in for me, doing repairs on fences and the like. I read the text my daughter sent and replied automatically, watch for nope ropes, wear sunscreen and love you all. About two hours later, she sent a photo of a rattlesnake, around 2.5 to 3 foot long. They were walking towards the stock tank and my son-in-law actually kicked the head of it before seeing it, jumping back a bit and shooting it. I need to add that he is also an experienced hunter, but it was well camouflaged. Four buttons, and he took a second photo of the head with the fangs exposed and I realized it was a young one. Younger ones have fangs that are set closer together, and they lose them as they grow. A more mature rattler will have fangs that are set farther apart. The number of rattles or buttons doesn’t accurately indicate the age as the buttons often break off, and when they shed their skins, some or all of
the rattles can come off. Big thanks to my Papaw and my Dad for the interesting bits of rattler trivia that popped into my head.
I’ve been on this property multiple times a week, from the time I was a small child to the present. I’ve walked it, hunted and fished there, herded cattle from one end to the next, drove through countless mesquites, and I always knew the nope ropes were there. But not once had I seen or shot one there, and I have no memory of my Dad or Papaw ever doing so either. I’ve never had any fear about being out there, and that is true even now.
My Dad and Papaw were diligent about making certain my sibling and I were aware of them, from their physical ability to rise, and literally leap at what they were striking at; to watching my Dad prize open the mouth of a dead one with a stick so he could show us the fangs, the distance between them, even tapping them so we could see the venom. I remember one weekend Papaw was burning prickly pear around our camp and killed a large rattler that just swallowed a full-grown rabbit whole. He cut the heart out of the noper, laid it on a tin pan and made note of the time. As odd as it sounds, it continued to contract for over five minutes. Obviously, it wasn’t a true heartbeat without any blood flow, but nonetheless, there was a continuous contraction of the muscle. On another trip, as we drove towards another part of the pasture in South Texas, we came upon two large rattlers fighting. When two male
rattlers fight, it is about strength and dominance, not about killing. This usually occurs during the mating season, and most often is nothing more than pushing against the other until one is pinned to the ground. It was fascinating to see, although unnerving to see the height they can achieve and the raw strength and power exhibited.
From an Indigenous perspective, snakes, like any other creature, are important. The stories, and connections to us as a people, are vast. Over the years, I have achieved more perspective, and understanding of my place in relation to them. It’s interesting to note that a lot of my dragon art, especially when I am painting on a stone featuring the eye and the scales, are often perceived as snakes.
I doubt that I will ever know the impetus of the fear and trauma that I felt with the nightmares as a child and young adult; but I can take ownership of that now with a painting. It’s all about perspective and acknowledging that while I cannot banish all of them from my land, I can paint them into a reality where I have equal power, and give them their due as creatures of spiritual knowledge.
Photo Credit: Billie K. Fidlin (backyard!)